43rd ♫ | one more time, one hundred more tries

[eudemonics]

THE MEMORY SHARE MEME
(i want every single person here to appreciate how hard it was to find a gif that adequately conveyed the idea of this meme)

HOW IT WORKS:
⍟ Post your character's toplevel with their name, canon and anything you might need to warn for in their memories.
⍟ Post a handful of memories from your character's past -- you can write them up or just links to clips and scenes, DO IT HOWEVER YOU LIKE.
⍟ SURPRISE, EVERYONE CAN SEE EACH OTHER'S MEMORIES so tag around as you like
⍟ GET EMOTIONALLY TERRORIZED FOR THE HOLIDAYS

Comments

II. a retainer's resolve

[scourgingstars]

['I swore an oath to stand with Noct and keep him safe.']

[The words alone caused Ardyn to hesitate, arrogant smile faltering to something...confused. The black-purple flame of darkness incarnate flickered and faded as he tried to comprehend this, failing like one struggling to gain footing on the rain-slicked stone underfoot. What kind of person actually followed through on such ridiculous promises? How absurd...mortals were selfish, cutting and running at the first sign of peril. Obviously Ignis should have just accepted the offer to come to Niflheim--even if it had just been Ardyn playing a game of baiting Noctis to the Crystal, obviously logic would have led the retainer to take the first opportunity to get out of the miserable hellhole that had once been Altissia, leaving his king behind.]

[...That was what retainers did, in Ardyn's experience.]

['Whatever it takes, I will protect him-!']

[Ardyn barely had enough time to notice what was in the adviser's hand before the scene erupted into bright light and agonized screaming. Ah--now that was funny. The Ring of the Lucii, the power of the Lucian line which rejected the unworthy and arrogant who would seek its power. The very ring worn by Ardyn's own brother, as well as countless other monarchs over the generations. He'd really die just for a chance at helping this miserable excuse for a prince?]

[That thought made the low chuckle in his throat sound terribly bitter, a current of cold jealousy running amidst the hatred and bloodlust that had become Ardyn's ordinary life in these past ages.]

[...And then it worked, striking the would-be Founder King utterly speechless. Ignis Scientia stood burning with fire and rebellion, warping back to an open space before the altar and scowling at Ardyn in a wordless challenge.]

Well-

[That loyalty made him sick to even witness, and he answered that challenge by warping himself in a streak of magenta, inches away from the adviser.]

-they've shown you their favor after all.

[A burst of the same corrupted darkness was thrown forth from Ardyn's hand, and the fight was on in an instant. Despite all the power Ignis was throwing around as if it were nothing at all, Ardyn...didn't even seem to be trying. It simply wasn't worth it to him, and he'd not even drawn a sword fromt the Armiger. Let the idiot retainer know his sacrifice was worth nothing, that Ardyn couldn't be killed or even wounded with all the strength of the Lucii and the ring. Every so often he'd throw out a bitterly cold taunt, if you're so keen on keeping him safe I'd like to see you try, how lucky to be surrounded by such skilled advisers-]

[Oh, he hated this. Hated Ignis, Gladiolus, Prompto, and hated Noctis for daring to have friends that would go to such absurd lengths for his protection.]

Why not cease this futile charade? Your appeals to hope and loyalty will all come to naught in the end!

[...Ardyn knew the answer. Knew it as well as he knew his own name, as he knew the color of the sky, as he knew that love and camaraderie were the most well-crafted lies the world had ever seen. His brother, his Shield, an entire kingdom he had fought and suffered for--'Ardyn Lucis Caelum' had been nothing to them, and so why should he ever think trust was more than a nice fairytale people told themselves to push back the encroaching darkness of endless solitude?]

[Ah, but if this went on Ardyn really might kill him out of spite alone. That wouldn't do, not after all this. Better to let the adviser live to realize how things like that truly ended; in pain and despair.]

[Back on the imperial airship, Ardyn just...calmly dusted off his coat, wrung rainwater out of the ends of his scarf, and calmly set himself to ignoring the question of whether Gilgamesh would ever have burned body and soul for his own would-be king's protection.]

[It didn't matter. He already knew the answer.]

should be sorry, am not

[founderinglight]

[When the vision clears -

There's a too-familiar figure standing just a bit off, waiting. No hat, but his blue scarf is pulled up in a makeshift hood, as though the memory of the rain could actually touch him. The clothes are not quite Izunia and not quite 'Ardyn,' but somewhere in between.

There's a good chance of this all going to hell immediately, as soon as he opens his mouth, but - ]

I hope you'll forgive me for enjoying your expression at that moment. [Any other forgiveness is off the table, he knows.] Your expression was priceless.

are you ever

[scourgingstars]

[...Well, if he didn't already think this a long and complicated delusion, that about solidified it. Because that couldn't be happening.]

I'm sure you thought it hysterical--as I recall you revel in my misery and misfortune.

signs point to no

[founderinglight]

Hardly. And let's not pretend that you were anything but taken by surprise there in any case.

[No, Ardyn, he doesn't revel in your pain. He just wants it to end.]

[scourgingstars]

Oh, shut up. You're the last person I wish to hear anything from on the matter.

[founderinglight]

I know I am.

[And yet, here he is.]

But even so, I'm sorry.

[scourgingstars]

Liar.

[Ardyn snapped that without thinking, scowling viciously as he did.]

Don't you dare apologize when we both know you would do all of it just the same again, given the chance.

[founderinglight]

[And Izunia just. Folds his arms, and adopts a posture that Ardyn surely hasn't forgotten is the one he used to use for 'I know damn well you're the reason there's chocobo dung tracked all over the rug, Ardyn.']

We both know, hmm? Funny, in all the centuries I spent in that ring, not a single person was ever able to see enough of my mind to pass judgement back, and you haven't even put it on!

[scourgingstars]

If I did, no doubt I would catch godsdamned fire. How ironic, that there's no way in hell I might be considered worthy in the eyes of my brother and the Lucii after all I've done.

And whose fault is that, exactly? Who was it that pushed me over the edge of two thousand years of misery and darkness?

will i ever tire of having this discussion fifty billion ways? Signs also point to no

[founderinglight]

...Well, you would, but it wouldn't be my doing. There are a hundred and twelve other people in there.

[RATHER CROWDED, HONESTLY.]

I won't shy from the blame, Ardyn. Just the assertion that making you suffer like that was ever my intent. I...

When Ignis donned the ring was the first time I understood that it was you, and not some monster wearing my brother's skin.

same

[scourgingstars]

Too little, too late, as the saying goes. You should have known before you cut me down in the first place.

[founderinglight]

I know. The what-if of it has destroyed me more effectively than you ever could, anyway.

[scourgingstars]

Good. If you expect sympathy, you look in precisely the wrong place for it.

have a chapter 12 noct. c:

[warpstriking]

[The sight is something he never thought he would ever witness. Let alone from the Chancellor's perspective. To hear Ignis's bloodcurdling screams, his resolve to stand by his helpless ass regardless of the price..!

Before now, he always thought it had been simply in the middle of the battle that had waged in the hell that became Altissia after Leviathan's awakening.]

So, that's how he...

[That's how he lost his vision, he couldn't get himself to finish. He thought he was angry before at just the sight of this bastard's smug face, and yet as the images fade he felt the ring in his pocket grow ever the heavier. That sickening pit in his stomach bubbling over as he's overcome not only by anger, but grief and a pain no words could describe just knowing not just what Luna had gone through to deliver it to him, but now Iggy... He supposed he should be proud upon realizing realizing that not only was it a trap Ardyn was setting up for him, but that he expected Ignis to take the easy way... and he absolutely refused. He chose to fight, and that...

It took Ignis's plea for him to end their adventure to a whole new level, and he couldn't help the sardonic chuckle escaping him. Man, did he feel like shit for not being able to do a damn thing to keep his best friend and brother from having to make the choice in the first place.]

OH DEAR :D

[scourgingstars]

My, that certainly did happen.

[ardyn, can you like. not?]

What an incomprehensible course of action. Almost insulting, I must confess.

[warpstriking]

[It's Ardyn we're talking about. If anything, he would be concerned if he wasn't being some level of spiteful bastard.]

Of course it would be to you!

[Never mind that he would have wished for his friend to have saved himself, but... he knew Ignis would never do it. Always taking the blame for his screw ups ever since childhood, never once complaining about it but always nagging him to do better. He was this close to striking at the man, but stayed his hand as everything else began to register. "Ardyn Lucis Caelum"? He'd heard that name before, but something about it didn't match up to the history lessons he'd pretended not to be paying attention to.]

...Anything resembling loyalty is foreign to you, isn't it. [That wasn't a question.]

[scourgingstars]

Obviously.

[And that was likely the most honest answer he'd ever given Noctis--or perhaps, anyone at all.]

It's long since been a concept I've accepted as nothing but a charming little myth.

I'm somehow sorry and not sorry at all. (Episode Ignis Alternate Ending spoilers)

[warpstriking]

[Really, he should get a cake to commemorate such an auspicious occasion. The day Ardyn actually was honest with anyone. It's a miracle that should be celebrated with a cake made of shit and dog piss thrown right into his face. Except that takes far too long to conjure up, and is far too disgusting on top of it.]

You're wrong about that.

[Just because it isn't something he doesn't acknowledge, or experienced... It doesn't make it any less real.]

If it was, Ignis would have followed you.

[And he doesn't even want to think on where that could lead..]

[scourgingstars]

I was quite surprised that he didn't, truthfully. It seemed the obvious choice in that situation.

[not everyone is fundamentally incapable of friendship, ardyn]

[warpstriking]

What's so obvious about leaving a brother behind?

[Oh, Astrals, if only he knew... But with what he could pick up between bloodlust and the rest, it... wasn't a picture he wanted to see in it's entirety.]

But I guess, if you can't even trust your Shield...

[Oh look, he did pay attention.]

[scourgingstars]

...I strongly advise you shut your mouth about him before I make you regret ever learning to speak.

[warpstriking]

Which one? [Because he was referring to Ignis with the first, so the next logical choice would be the Blademaster. But his ability to give a damn was lost about two months ago.]

[scourgingstars]

The last thing I want to hear about is that cowardly little shade haunting the Tempering Grounds. And I might also offer you the advice that I know more than you think about leaving one's brother behind, as well.

You hardly know as much as you think, impudent child.

[warpstriking]

[He could make a comment about how Gladio fought said shade and won, or that he could really care less about it in the slightest other than how his own Shield seemed the more confident for it. But something keeps him from doing so. Namely, the fact that aside from how the history he knew, and the one Ardyn just inferred in his memories just didn't match up.]

You're sure in a giving mood.

[...Is that a bit of trepidation behind the thinly veiled anger and snark? The world may never know.]

[scourgingstars]

Oh, I just think it cruel not to offer the full context of the matter. Heavens know the average history class must tell a hilariously inaccurate rendition of things.