60th ♫ | pop in the nevermelt icecubes

[mytarget]

y'all know what this meme is about

Comments

oda nobunaga | ikemen sengoku

[goban]

1. Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.

2. moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone

3. I think we're only still together so we can make each other miserable

4. Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.

4

[potato_powerhouse]

Eating her feelings is also good. Then she has more protein and calories for channeling the rage that will follow into a strict workout routine!

1

[udonsong]

Whatever you say, my lord

Zuri Tamirat | OC

[therightsword]

1. I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire.

2. Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.

3. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.

4. Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?

5. (Text her!)

4

[zweihandler]

people keep expecting me to care about thor and it's EXHAUSTING

Erina Estival | OC

[zweihandler]

[ i got too lazy to make Future Erina icons so just pretend i have them ]

1. ya know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.

2. laying on the floor and listening to sad spotify playlists together is an ESSENTIAL part of the lesbian bonding process

3. if i HAVE to go to jail i deserve to be arrested for something better than some fuck named bucky

4. swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice

5. TEXT YA GIRL

2

[quietknight]

Oh that DOES sound nice

4

[shipoutofluck]

don't get us banned from ANOTHER place

Anastasia Fabre | Original Character

[nefilim]

1. In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.

2. My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.

3. Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.

4. So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable.

Sawatari Makoto | Kanon

[yes_im_kawaii]

1) Buying $100 worth of beef jerky sounded like a terrific idea last night.

2) Fine, I'll cuddle you, but only for the purpose of trying to survive.

3) I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that I'm supposed to hate you for it.

4) WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS. HAPPY MONDAY.

Bai Lin | Original

[fistsofchange]

1: next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
2: are you inviting me to ice cream?
3: How naked do you want me to be?
4: For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
5: [Or text her!]

4

[nojohnyouare]

Vitamins?

Chelsea Moore | Coyote Ragtime Show

[niceoppai]

1) He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.

2) Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.

3) The police scanner is talking about you again...

4) Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate.

Terry | Original

[terrytheterrible]

1: I know her cup size but not her name....
2: Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
3: Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
4: sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
5: [Or text him!]

Leander Smith | Original

[acegunman]

1: I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
2: Stop chatting and get in the bloody car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
3: All I have in my pockets is 10 cents and a plastic ducky. I can't explain last night.
4: it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
5: [Or text him!]

Wayland Forge | Original

[drbrainjar]

1: I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
2: It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
3: ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
4: If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
5: [Or text him/her!]

Katina Tarask | Super Robot Wars

[grandtheftmecha]

1. you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.

2. I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back of my car so we could have sex.

3. There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"

4. You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky

4

[potato_powerhouse]

Sorry you can't take me anywhere when I drink. In my defense, Shoshosu told you that she was a light weight when you sneaked me that beer at the zoo.

2

[secondarynature]

I'm the one who agreed to take things slow, but I'm also the one who quite happily gave you oral sex in the back of your car. So, we both kinda failed that one.

Also, I think you mistexted Miss Katina, unless you have a bad habit of car sex after making responsible choices with more than one guy at a time.

Rafael "Superego" Cardenas | OC

[psychicshell]

1: you asked me how to turn on the ladder
2: I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order in which they would die in the food chain.
3: I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
4: False alarm. still invincible. :)
5: [Or text him!]

4

[maidofmistakes]

Please tell me you didn't test it.

Cor Leonis - Final Fantasy XV - OTA

[immortalmarshal]

1) Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Ramuh grant me patience...

2) Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding a cat in the air singing "the circle of life"

3) I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date

4) Just make sure you put pants on

5) Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles
Yes, cuddles
And buys me dinner and alcohol.
I'll keep him around and cross that other lover bridge when we get there

6) ((wildcard! text him instead!))

4

[reorienting]

But it's not pants day.

Ling Yao | Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood | OTA

[obtainprotectretain]

1. my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening

2. It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.

3. Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.

4. I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.

5. I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.

6. Text him.

[Voicetesting.]

[Ling is fifteen or sixteen in canon, but he can be aged up to adulthood if you would prefer that.]

[Kink list, and general permissions. Crosscanon and AUs and OCs welcome.]

Greed | Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood | OTA

[nosuchthingasnosuchthing]

1. seriously iPhone. stop autocorrecting all my fucks into ducks. you're making all my strong worded texts look harmless and adorable.

2. Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?

3. people asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.

4. i got me so drunk!

5. How do you say "put it in me" in Xingese... I'm dealing with language barriers here.

6. I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..

7. I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call

8. Text him.



[Kink list, and general permissions. Crosscanon and AUs and OCs welcome.]

[Both Greed 1.0 and Greedling are available, though if you aren’t familiar with Full Metal Alchemist: Brotherhood canon, you should check my permissions or kinklist for an important note on Greedling if you want to do something sexy and/or romantic with that version of Greed. I like doing sexy and/or romantic things with both versions but I think that, if you want to do that kind of stuff with Greedling, you should know what you’re getting into first.]