oddsandends | 92nd ♫ | the quietness, profoundly consuming silence

[Even though the trial's over, Shu can't stop poking at the one unsolved point--Akane's still-unrevealed secret--like it's a missing tooth, a strange and distracting absence in his understanding of what happened. Two more people are gone. Shion and Akane, two weird but likable (he thought, anyway) girls are dead. Killed. It seems so senseless; why did Akane have to go so far to protect herself, when no one said a damn thing even at the trial? How bad could her secret have been if it was so unmemorable, whoever read it failed to bring it up?

Subdued--but even he usually is at these times, and how much does it suck for this to have become so routine, they all have a "usually"?--Shu sips a cold soda and observes the others, looking for the signs someone held back. He's pretty good at reading people, right? Someone ought to be showing guilt or nerves, should be showing something he can ask about and get answers, unless they really did forget--

His eyes fall on Shinonome-senpai in the corner.]

...!

[With their numbers so reduced and conversation only a murmur, the sharp breath he takes in sounds loud to his own ears.

No, no one forgot Akane's secret. They never even opened the envelope to read it. Color flees from his face as the realization comes together. Instead of Shion, the target Akane wanted so desperately was Shinonome-senpai. And because he destroyed the envelope for her without so much as looking at it himself--

He could have stopped this. Could have seen it coming. Shion is dead because he didn't.

The side of his soda can pops in and he looks down, surprised to find he's gripping it so tightly.]

[ From across the room, Ryoko looks up and just barely avoids meeting his gaze. Like some weird synchronicity, the understanding settles in her mind the same time as it does Amiguchi's and it leaves her feeling wound up and queasy on the inside. There's that feeling again, as if a phantom hand had dug its way into her guts to squeeze and she pulls in an involuntary breath to punctuate the twist.

She could sit here and let the night drift on and pretend she doesn't know what she knows. It's not like any of the others would have reason to figure it out and Amiguchi wouldn't press and push her too hard if she played dumb. If she wanted to pretend she knew nothing of this, it might be easy. But it would mean leaving Amiguchi alone to carry it and... she really can't be that cruel.

Trying to pretend she's just drifting over casually, but knowing nothing about her approach is casual, Ryoko makes her way over to him. She ends up close to his side, so she doesn't have to raise her low, worn voice enough for anyone else to overhear when she speaks. ]

... It was Shinjo's. It must have been.

[He looks up when she comes close, then down when he hears what she has to say. ...Well, no point in playing dumb now.]

Yeah.

[His soda's mostly empty. Shu lets it dangle from his hand as he crosses his arms, as if unconsciously protecting himself from his own understanding.]

I--I didn't know. I didn't look.

[It doesn't absolve him from anything; at least, it doesn't absolve him of his unwitting part in Akane's paranoia. In Shion's death. Still, he wants Shinonome-senpai to know, because--because he doesn't want her to think he kept his mouth shut on purpose. He doesn't want her to think he did it for her. That he made it her fault.]

I didn't think it'd... lead to this.

I know. I didn't think you would have done, after I asked.

[ She makes an effort to keep her voice low, gentler than she usually allows it to be. If this mess is anyone's fault, it's hers. Maybe it wouldn't have made any difference at all if they'd looked. Maybe she would have ended up dead instead of Shion. They have no way of knowing either way, and that frustrates her beyond belief.

But what she does know is that the idea of Amiguchi blaming himself for this makes her feel tense and uneasy. She doesn't want it to happen. ]

... Maybe I shouldn't have, though. Maybe I should've looked at least before giving it to you. I just...

[ She trails off for a moment and then lets herself sigh. ]

I was worried I might read something I'd rather not know.

[A curt shake of his head flicks his hair out of his face.]

Yeah, no, Shinonome-senpai. You did the right thing. Isn't that what we're always taught, don't stick your nose where it doesn't belong?

[Now there's a lesson he never learns. If Shu Amiguchi knew how to mind his own business, he wouldn't be in half the crazy pickles he gets into. Nor would he know a quarter of the people he considers friends.

He lowers his head further, jaw clenched, frustrated with himself. Why couldn't his inveterate busybodying get in the way when it counted, when two girls' lives were hanging in the balance? Why is all he can do kick himself when it's over, every single freakin' Friday?]

If anything, I shouldn't have read yours. I thought--well, the first name I saw in it was "Tetsuya Ida," and I thought I got my own somehow. Like I'd lucked out.

[Instead, Agent Washington cornered him on Wednesday for an, uh, interesting chat about the memories of tortured A.I. Shu's still confused. Anyway, that's besides the point.]

What I'm saying is, there's no way you're at fault for leaving it alone, Senpai. [...] I guess neither of us is.

[ The noise she makes doesn't quite become a laugh, just a soft, mirthless little breath out. She's never been particularly good at minding her own business – it seems a particularly cruel sort of irony that the one time she tries to do so, things end up like this.

Amiguchi's probably right. If Shinjo was that determined to protect her secret, it's likely that someone would have ended up dead at the end of this week whatever they did or didn't do. Not that it makes Ryoko feel any better about the whole mess.

She sighs. Dealing with all this had been so much easier when she could still tell herself she wasn't getting attached to any of these people. ]

... It's fine. You reading my envelope, I mean. [ She shifts her weight from one foot to the other and looks out across the room, so she doesn't risk meeting his gaze as she speaks. ] If it had to be anyone here who got it, then I'm glad it was you.

...Really?

[He peers at her with a little surprise, a little hope, from under the carefree sweep of his hair. It's a distraction, not a fix, for how much like a sack of crap he feels, but he'll take it for now.]

Why? 'Cause we're from the same world?

Mm. There's that. And...

[ She's trying to sound casual and unbothered by it but even as she speaks, she feels pinpricks of warmth start to bloom high on her face – the most obvious telltale of her real thoughts, whatever she's trying to playact at feeling. How annoying. ]

I don't think it would have been hard to figure out that it was mine. I mean, my name was in it. But if anyone else had gotten it... I don't think they would've understood how bad it was. They might just have handed it over or told me without thinking twice about it. But you... understood. About Mr. Ida and all the rest of it.

[ She's tracing lines across the floor now, focusing her gaze there rather than anyone else. ]

I appreciated it.

[ Which is as close to an outright 'thank you' as she might be ready to go. ]

[Just like that, existing in the terrible here and now softens a bit. What he did for her wasn't much, but it was something. He did try.

A hint of a smile plays over Shu's face. It's not very like his usual ones and, still, entirely genuine. He smooths down his hair and lets his shoulders fall.]

Heh. Well. You're welcome, anytime.

[He needs it. He needs to help. Nothing else in his life has ever meant anything, really.]

Thanks, Senpai.

[ After a day like today, a trial like today's, Ryoko doesn't really have a lot to smile about. But when she glances back at him and sees the way some of the tired upset has left him and that smile on her face, she finds her expression warming into a rueful little smile in turn. ]

Thank me when we both make it out of here alive. [ Her tone is dry, but she's going for something light. As light as it gets at these little gatherings. ] Or at least when I've done a little more towards making that happen.

[If Shinonome can go for light at a time like this, our buoyant boy Shu is more than willing to rise to the occasion himself. His smile, while still small and wan, widens fractionally.]

Oh yeah? Planning a daring rescue on us, are you?

[Kyaaa, senpa~i! You make a boy's kokoro dokidoki!]

Oh, of course. Any moment now, I plan to summon my Sentinel and break us all out of here. Our host might be strong but I think even she'd have some trouble dealing with a giant robot.

[ She delivers that all in perfect, serious deadpan – serious enough that you might believe her if it wasn't for the wry, barely-there smile on her face. After a moment, though, her brow furrows. ]

Then again, we have no idea where we are right now, so maybe breaking out with a Sentinel wouldn't be such a good idea. We could be at the bottom of the ocean for all we know.

[Despite everything--or perhaps because of everything--this is just enough to get him to laugh a little.]

No problem if we make sure everyone can swim, right?

[He tilts his head, still smiling at her, wondering how it is she can make him feel better like this. How it is she'd even want to.]

[ A hard breath through her nose that could be – almost – mistaken for a laugh. ]

Sure. No problem at all.

I'll have to leave that part to you, though. I'm not exactly a strong enough swimmer to be teaching anyone.

What, by myself? Who's gonna listen to a first-year?

[In case anyone needed the casual reminder that Shu Amiguchi is a fifteen-year-old INFANT.]

How about I just start with you, and then the both of us can open swimming lessons together? Bet it'd make the girls-- [He stops, blindsided once again by the reality they lost two more girls today, but lifts his chin and rallies--as much as he can.] --more comfortable. You know, having someone on their side to look out for them.

Assuming this isn't an excuse to see what sort of swimsuit I wear, [ gottem ] do you really think they'd be any more likely to listen to me?

[ Says Ryoko from her advanced age of sixteen.

Then again... given how high risk everything is around here, even something as simple as getting a little better at swimming might not be a bad idea. And it's something to pass the time with, at least. ]

... Maybe once my bandages are off, I'll think about it.

For real?

[That really, truly, seriously seems to cheer him up some. Girl in swimsuit, even if it's just the idea of it. Teenage boys. You gotta love 'em.

Or maybe it's just that Shinonome's being nice to him, entertaining his ideas, speaking to and answering him like he's really there and not some annoying, transient event to get through that stokes some of that brightness back up in his face. Her kindness tastes fizzy on his tongue, like a swig of soda.]

Heheh, finally! Something to look forward to around here. Now there's some motivation to get through this.

[ Her eyebrows raise a little, but she doesn't look displeased at least. ]

Really? If that's all it takes to cheer you up, I would've told you sooner.

[ Not that it should really matter to her whether Amiguchi's in good cheer or not – sure, maybe it makes things better for the group as a whole if they're all motivated and they've got good morale, but that's it. Even so, it makes her heart feel just a little lighter to see that familiar boyish grin on Amiguchi's face. After all– ]

Being so gloomy doesn't really suit you, somehow.

…Huh.

[That’s the sort of thing he usually finds himself saying to girls. When he’s rewarded with a smile after offering a juice box on a bad day, or for lending his umbrella in a sudden shower—watching a girl’s face transform from upset into sweet brightness never fails to pick him up. It’s never about him, it’s about the attention he gives them, but that never stops him from offering it. He just—it really brightens the whole world, a cute girl’s smile. If all he has to do to bring it out is notice someone…

Well. He’s just never experienced it from this side, and now it feels like Senpai’s giving him that kind of notice. Feeling just a bit bashful, he ruffles his hair and keeps smiling.]

That so? Didn’t realize I was bringing down the mood. Sorry about that.

I don't know if I'd go that far. I think it'd be pretty hard to bring the mood down any more than it already is.

[ They'll all pick themselves up by the end of the night, if not sooner – that's how it always goes, after all. It's just the process of licking their wounds that drags things out.

Standing here with Amiguchi though, Ryoko thinks she'll be able to manage. ]

You just seem more like yourself when you're on good spirits, that's all.

[Oh, girl, u don't kno what Pandora's Box you're opening here.]

So you like my usual self, huh, Senpai?

[Grin, grin, grin.]

[ oh she really kinda did that to herself, huh ]

Let's not get too carried away. But if you really must know, yes, I prefer it to seeing you down in the dumps.

[ Coming from Ryoko, that's a pretty glowing compliment... ]

[Maybe he knows that, because her words broaden rather than discourage his smile until it takes over his whole face.]

Heh, then you're on the right track, 'cause that's exactly the kind of thing it cheers me up to hear. I'm easy, you know?

[ It's almost a little embarrassing, just how earnest he is at every turn. Ryoko doesn't think she'll ever be able to match him – nor would she want to – but it makes talking to him... easier, she supposes. She never has to guess at his intentions and she imagines it might be easy if she ever had to.

In its own way, that's reassuring. Not that she'd ever tell Amiguchi, of course. That's our Ryoko! ]

Really? I think you could afford to raise your standards a little more than that.

Higher than a cute girl telling me she likes me the way I am? You're kidding, right? No guy could ask for more than that.

[He's joking AND he means it. Get you a man who can do both.]

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