59th ♫ | somewhere faraway and never to return

[mytarget]

THE FGO MEME
(aka the "I want to play in Fateverse but every time i try and keep the holy grail war rules straight in my head i just burst into tears" meme)

OPTIONS:

1. THE LAST MASTER OF CHALDEA!!!! listen, someone needs to be Gudako around here
2. Have your character summoned as a Heroic Spirit!!! You can either AU them as a specific mythological figure OR if you can fudge it, have your character themselves summoned as a Heroic Spirit! HOW EXCITING.
3. MAYBE A DEMI-SERVANT?? fgo isn't complete without kouhai

PROMPT IDEAS:

1. SLICE OF LIFE BULLSHIT IN CHALDEA. honestly keeping up with the chaldeans is a hit sitcom waiting to happen as it is.
2. SINGULARITY SHENANIGANS!! there's like, seven of them, go hog wild and have some adventures
3. oh i didn't think up enough to fill out this list. OH WELL.

THE LONG AND THE SHORT VERSION IS:

- Post a toplevel with the AU deets of your character and whatever you're hankering to play
- Tag around
- HAVE A GOOD TIME

Comments

let's go wiiiiiiiith lancer and sol

[bigcore]

Do not steal.

[Generally, Foreigners aren't supposed to make sense, right? At least that's what the overall consensus is for why this one is constantly spouting non sequiturs and speaks in a weirdly disaffected tone. She's also got... a camera? She probably picked it up somewhere, but either way, she's aiming it at Bryn.]

Your eye is left and my eye is right. Does that mean we make up a whole face?

[draconite]

Oh, do you think?

[ Bryn beams at her and lifts a hand to touch the rose blooming out of her eye. ]

We'd be a bit lopsided though, no? I don't think the left and the right would exactly match...

[bigcore]

[Tita pokes at her own eyepatch. This is just what people do here, right?]

Hmm, guess you're right. But maybe some aliens have two mouths. Two noses. Probably.

[draconite]

Oh, but, then again... if we had two mouths, wouldn't we be able to each much faster? Imagine how efficient it would be!

[bigcore]

Unless you had one esophagus. Lots of choking. Learn first aid.

[draconite]

Not if you were sure to chew thoroughly!

[ She says this so proudly, like she's certain this is a real galaxy brain move. ]

As long as you're careful to chew, you can easily eat most things.

[bigcore]

Huh... You're wise.

[and she's gonna randomly snap some photos of bryn with that camera.]

Most things?

[draconite]

Yes, of course! We're Servants, aren't we? It probably wouldn't taste quite as good as real food, but I don't imagine there'd be much we could eat that would do us harm.

[bigcore]

Teach me your ways, Lancer.

[She's already trying to pull off a wall panel.]

[draconite]

Eh? Ah, m–maybe that's not such a good place to start! Don't destroy the wall!

[ HOW ON EARTH IS BRYN THE STRAIGHT MAN HERE ]

[bigcore]

[Tita lets go and tilts her head.]

No good, huh? Thought anything was anything.

[draconite]

... Perhaps "anything" was just a little too broad...

[ Being the reasonable one is exhausting. God knows how Reifr does it. ]

Besides – I said that we could reasonably eat anything, not that we should be doing it!

[bigcore]

Aww. [She slumps and rocks on her heels.] Okaaay. Then what's can and what's should? For eating.

[draconite]

Should is easy, isn't it? You should only eat food. As for could... that would be anything you could fit into your mouth, whether or not it was food, I think.

[bigcore]

I got excited for a bit there. Sad, sad Tita. But food's good. Better than space food. Except if it's really bad.

[draconite]

What... exactly is space food?

[ ?!?!?!? ]

[bigcore]

Hmm... Dry. Boring. Blocks. Hydrate them.

[draconite]

... Are you quite sure that really was food?

[ YOU'VE JUST DEMONSTRATED YOU CAN'T BE COMPLETELY

RELIED ON TO TELL ]

[bigcore]

Huh... Yeah. Not good, though. I want chicken, I want liver. Like the commercial.

[how do you know this you are from space]

[draconite]

Wh... at... is a commercial, exactly?

[bigcore]

Oh, they had some to watch on the shiny computer box. "I can see myself in this china."

[draconite]

Yes, the teevee!

[ She's so proud of herself for remembering what it's called, even if her pronunciation is, uh... interesting. ]

What other sorts of things have you been watching on it?

[bigcore]

Whatever they have on. Did you know they have a whole channel just selling things? Bunch of jewelry and makeup. Vitamins too. Three easy payments. Dunno what's easy about it, though.

[draconite]

The teevee is only one way, isn't it? The people on the other side can't hear you... so how exactly would they know what you were planning to buy?

[ Her brow furrows in thought for a second, but then she brightens again. ]

Ah, I know! You'd simply need to phone them, isn't that right?

[bigcore]

Uh-huh. They have a number on the bottom. Think people'd get mad if we bought stuff, though? Probably.